Published in Chicago Internet WebPages Newspaper in November 1997.

How would you like to take a break from this fast-paced world and try something a little different? Let's get away from the humdrum of life and go to a fascinating new place . . . the wacky side of the Internet.

Join me on a cruise of the backroads of the Net . . . and let's see what unusual and offbeat sites we can dig up.

Darkside

The next time you need a well-deserved vacation, consider staying at the Lizzie Borden Bed & Breakfast at Fall River, Massachusetts. "Experience First Hand A Piece of Grisly 1890's Americana." Stay in the Andrew and Abbey Borden Suite for $219.40 a night, with a minimum stay of two nights. Extra bonus: the place is reputed to be haunted.

The Tombstone Tourist is dedicated to finding the final resting places of the rich, the famous, the infamous, and those with especially neat tombstones. Read a little about the lives of people like Dean Martin, Buddy Holly, and Andy Gibb, then view pictures of their final resting places (complete with "how to get there" directions).

We've been to their graves, now let's read their wills. At Wills on the Web, you can read actual wills of people like Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, President Nixon, Elvis, and Babe Ruth.

How about a site that offers anything you'd ever want to know about vampires, but were too scared to ask? The Vampire A-Z site is your very own guide to those creatures of the darkness.

Different, to Say the Least

Admit it. Pigs are cute. Sort of. Well, at SwinesOnline, they really believe it. You can enter a virtual pig raising competition, learn what it takes to be a pig guardian, or talk to other pig farmers and exchange tips.

Some sites can be rather morbid, or humorous, depending on how you look at them. Bus Plunge, which is dedicated to buses that have careened off the sides of mountains or dived off bridges, is such a site. You'll learn plunge causes, such as Bridgus Slipperius, Curvus Skiddus, or Ferryboat Sinkus. Read of near-plunge experiences, or discover what makes a plunge a classic.

Even the stars have problems, believe it or not. At the Dermatology Cinema, you can see pictures of celebrities with skin disorders. Or, you can see which skin conditions are used to portray evil in the movies, such as Freddy Krueger's burn scars.

Here's a helpful site: How to Toilet Train Your Cat. 'Nuff said.

Enlightening

For a rather unique educational site, go to Virtual Frog Dissection Kit, where users can generate views of a frog from many different directions under various stages of dissection. There's even the capacity to generate movies. (I'm feeling sick.)

Another unusual educational site is the Last Word Science Questions and Answers, which contains over 350 questions on scientific phenomena. For example, you can discover why certain kinds of typos are more common, or what the cause of death is in a crucifixion.

Is Internet surveillance the wave of the future? Watch out Chicago, because the camera is on YOU! At Live Video on the Net by Perceptual Robotics, Web users can view live scenes from Lincoln Park Zoo or the House of Blues. You simply choose the location you want to view, then click to zoom in or out.

Interesting!

Let's take a virtual tour of Egypt's Tourism Net where you'll find a system to write your name or any text in Hieroglyphic (Pharaonic) language.

Do you enjoy optical illusions, visual effects, or a little magic? Come with me to Grand Illusions, where we're read The Strange Story of Napoleon's Wallpaper. We'll also find optical and moon illusions and a scientific puzzle.

Have you ever tried to make different words out of the letters of your name? The Anagram Generator will take your name (or anyone else's) and tell you what lurks within those letters.

If you like fast foods and are a glutton for punishment, Fast Food Facts will be more than happy to tell you how much fat was in that hamburger you shoved down your throat for lunch. The spicy Italian salad at 896 calories and 60 grams of fat is a real killer too!

Do fake-sounding accents in the movies bother you? Movie stars need to venture over to American Slanguages, where they can learn to talk like the locals. Click on New Orleans and learn that they pronounce their city "Gnaw Lynn's." If you click on Cheyenne, you'll learn that they consider any road that's paved an 'expressway'. I'll let you visit the Chicago page yourself. <grin>

"It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife" is the first line of a book. Off the top of your head, tell me the book's title. At First Lines, you can test your literary knowledge in categories such as Voices of Women, The Way It Was, and Who Done It. (The answer: Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. I missed it too.)

Just Plain Fun

How many times have you flipped coins and called out heads or tails? At Ken White's Coin Flipping Page, you can do just that by using cybercoins. At the time of this writing, the total face value of coins flipped so far was $24,315.09. The site also features a statistical article about coin flipping put out by the Journal of Statistics Education.

How about an Internet alternative to the funny pages? The Comic Strip offers your favorite comics, such as Marmaduke, Luann, and Over the Hedge.

Now here's a neat site. At Faces v2.1, you can combine the faces of famous people to make new faces. I combined Elizabeth Hurley's head with Rodney Dangerfield's eyes and John Travolta's mouth. Interesting combination.

Are you good at staring contests? Try your luck with Stare Down Sally with her emerald green eyes. I'll warn you: she's good!

Oh gosh--you just have to try this one. At the Guess the Evil Dictator or Television Sit-Com Character website, you pretend to be your favorite dictator or television sit-com character, and the site will try to guess who you're supposed to be. It's a riot!

Trivia, trivia, and more trivia! TriviaWeb is a free interactive trivia game which allows you to test your knowledge in several topic categories. Your scores will be calculated and saved, then compared against other participants. The only problem with the site is the 60-second time limit for answering questions before being bounced back to the beginning. You can't even cheat!

At Wally's Weird Web Site, you can pick one of 75 voice personalities, type in your message, and Weird Wally will produce your custom voice message (free if under 20 words). Pick from voices such as Alfred Hitchcock, Edith Bunker, or Forrest Gump.

Here's a site the whole family will enjoy: LifeSavers Candystand. Visit the arcade for exciting games such as Breath Savers Billiards or Waterpark Pinball. Or, you might prefer a mystery travel game, or play their instant win game for a chance at winning a million bucks.

Everyone needs a good laugh (and a hug) every day. You're on your own for the hug, but funnies.com can help with the laugh. An example of computer humor is this error message that we'd all like to see: ... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N).

Quacks? Maybe Not

Are you an extrovert or an introvert? Intuitive or sensing? Feeling or thinking? Judging or perceptive? The Keirsey Temperament Sorter is a personality test that scores results according to the Myer-Briggs system.

If it's time for your yearly eye exam, buzz on over to Neoptx Eye Site and have your eyes tested over the Internet. You'll still need to go to the eye doctor, but their online reading eye test is fascinating.

With the advent of the Internet, the days of propping up your feet in a therapist's office and telling him/her what's bothering you have changed. Now, in the privacy of your own home in front of your computer screen, you can get online counseling at Wired Senses Online Counseling. An email session is $12, or a CU-SeeMe telecounseling session is $25 for a half hour.

Do you remember biorhythms, those neat little charts that would tell you if you were having a physically, emotionally, intuitively, or intellectually challenging day (as if you didn't already know)? At Web-O-Rhythm, you can get a Web-generated biorhythm chart and even download it for later use.

Serious Stuff

The Smoking Gun brings you exclusive, confidential documents that can't be found elsewhere on the Web. Using material obtained from government and law enforcement sources and from court files nationwide, they guarantee everything there is 100% authentic. For example, you can see the autopsy report on JonBenet Ramsey, or the federal criminal complaint against Autumn Jackson and Jose Medina, the duo charged with trying to extort $24 million from Bill Cosby.

"The Fourth Turning takes a close look at the rhythms of American history and makes the following prediction: Starting about 10 years from now, America will enter an era of crisis that will extend until the late 2020s. It could end in triumph or tragedy. America could self-destruct -- or rise to a higher level of civilization. The outcome is up to us." Connected to a popular book by the same title, the site features discussion forums, historical data to support their claims, and interviews with the authors.

How would you like to "break in" to the National Security Archive? You can . . . online. Learn the truth of the Cuban missile crisis in 1962, or read the CIA and Assassinations: The Guatemala 1954 Documents.

Totally Senseless

Now here's an unusual site: Totally Useless Office Skills, where you'll learn how to play with office supplies. For example, you can learn how to play "Happy Birthday" by punching in the numbers on your telephone.

The experts at the Centre for the Easily Amused are determined to offer you the Ultimate Guide to Wasting Time. Clicking on "sites that do stuff" will bring up links to places such as the Band-Aid Applet or the Magic 8 Bra.

At the Stupid Page, they poke good-natured fun at the stupid things that surround us every day. For example, in Appomattox, Virginia, a funeral home sign reads "Colde and Stiff Funeral Home." Or, there's a sign in Delaware, Ohio, that reads "Moose Parking Only."

For an archive of totally useless facts, visit Terryscape, a spinoff of Netscape. While the facts may be useless, they're quite fascinating, such as President John F. Kennedy could read 4 newspapers in 20 minutes. Or, "bookkeeper" is the only word in English language with three consecutive double letters.

Robin Nobles is a freelance writer who can be reached at robinnobles@robinsnest.com.

Back to Main Articles Page